By David Hackett

For The Beachcomber

For years, the fall air made me yearn for helmets, pads and tackling dummies. I would wake up from vivid dreams of Friday nights on the gridiron — my four years of high school eligibility somehow restored, and me now capable of catching passes rather than blocking for them! A true Walter Mitty moment.

My proto-male fantasy of football glory has finally subsided due to years of intensive estrogen therapy. Sorry, Coach Wally, but 31 daughters will do that to you. I have been retrained, reprogrammed and reformed to associate fall air with the beautiful game of soccer. This once-proud big ugly has transformed into a big lug of a girls’ soccer coach.

Fall is always about transitions, and this year is no different. My 19 daughters on the U15 Eagles soccer team have left the familiarity of middle school to experience the uncertain environment of high school. They all share the same doey-eyed look as they shuffle around campus trying to comprehend classes and cliques. 

Yet, as they deftly dribble and pass around the soccer pitch, I’m confident that they will find their way. All of these young women will face challenges — some far worse than others — but the game will anchor them. The lessons of adversity, challenge, hard work and accomplishment mastered on the soccer field will give them an extra reserve for their toughest days. Surrounded by the sisterhood of team, they will not be alone.

Standing at the cusp of this journey are my 12 daughters on the U11 Gators soccer team. Wearing the same green-and-white Vashon Island Soccer Club uniforms that their older sisters occupied just four years ago, they are determined to forge their own path. As coach, my job is to develop their love for the game, a capacity for hard work and an abiding respect for each other. After all, these goofy-eyed fifth-graders will soon enough be Vashon High School’s graduating class of 2017.

So why does this old football lineman spend three nights a week and every weekend day this fall coaching girls’ soccer? I’ve heard from some who have never experienced the transformative power of team sports cynically claim that we coaches are merely living vicariously through our daughters.   

The essential reality is that we are returning the favor that a generous adult bestowed on us long ago. I still remember Pop Warner football practices, where we had sleet, rain, snow and hail all in one fine Pacific Northwest fall evening. While we kids marveled at the loud pinging sound that hail made impacting plastic football helmets, our coaches — with cold rain dripping down their generally balding heads — reminded us of the need to practice with purpose. Any misery I must have felt was quickly crowded out by accomplishment and the wonder of luminescent rain drops swirling past stadium lights.

My 31 daughters will one day be responsible for far more than a well-placed shot on goal. The storied playgrounds of Eton have been replaced by the soccer fields of small communities like Vashon as the training ground for our next generation of leaders. By supporting these kids, we ensure our own future.

Like many youth coaches, whether it be for soccer, football, basketball or debate, I measure my success by how many kids are inspired to return for another season or reach for higher goals. Win-loss records are notoriously fickle, but a continuing commitment to self-improvement, team and community is worth cherishing. 

My ultimate reward will come on a fall day many years from now when player becomes coach to the next generation of children. My grown-up daughters themselves will experience the immense gratification of helping kids achieve more than they thought they could on their own. As with me, my daughters will find that all the cold, rainy fall nights are well worth the fleeting discomfort.

— David Hackett is a soccer coach and single dad to Megan and Merideth.