Dancing
Let’s not ban grinding, but give dancers information
I liked the dirty dancing column in this week’s paper and was thankful The Beachcomber brought it up.
I myself was thinking just the same thing recently — only after the first McMurray dance! Mostly eighth-graders but some seventh-graders were “grinding” on the dance floor, just like it was described in this week’s paper.
And, even though Greg Allison did a yeoman’s job of trying to keep it all PG-13, there were plenty of shocked sixth-graders gazing from the sidelines. It sure seemed a long way from Chautauqua at that moment! I could almost hear some of those kids thinking, “Oh, I guess this is how I am supposed to act? After all, the ‘cool’ big kids are doing it. I guess I should do it too.”
I suppose we shouldn’t be so surprised the high school kids are such “grinders” because they get three years of “Dry Hump 101” at the middle school dances!
I too am a bit horrified that this sort of thing is going on, but I think we can all agree that forbidding this behavior is only going to make it even more sexy.
So perhaps we should just be honest with the kids and ourselves. This has nothing to do with musical taste or even dance style. This is all about sex — pure and simple.
I propose we turn the lights up just a little bit, but only to add a Planned Parenthood information table in a well-traveled corner. Free condoms! Real information! Maybe posters of the sperm and ovum or a crying baby!
If we are going to basically allow them to simulate a sexual act on the dance floor, then let’s at least make sure they get good information about consequences and how to make healthy sexual decisions.
— Shelley Dillon
It’s the job of adults to teach kids respect
Last week, The Beachcomber ran a column regarding a type of sexually charged dancing happening at Vashon High School. In the article, it was pointed out that some administrators think that if we don’t let our kids do this, they might be somewhere else doing something worse. “At least they’re safe.”
That is an illusion we can’t afford to indulge — and a poor excuse for not doing our job as parents and educators.
Many of us pushed the limits in high school. For most of us it was about experimentation and peer pressure, and it didn’t become a pattern because most of it felt pretty bad the next morning. Remember that feeling?: “What did I just do? Now I feel really bad… or weird or…” Some kids feel this way about VHS dances. They’ve said so.
Why is the school sanctioning this behavior? When we were in high school, our best teachers and coaches had the courage to tell us what they expected of us and show us how to move through life with dignity.
The ’70s, when many of us were in high school, were as much a time of drugs and sex in our culture as these, but the parents and educators who held a high standard made a big difference in our lives.
If they lacked the confidence to talk about morals, they at least had the courage to teach us some manners. They were thinking about our future, teaching us how to live well together.
Of course kids will push the limits, but it’s our job to hold the line and teach them how to respect and honor relationships, how to have fun without acting like animals, how to approach things like love with a little grace.
We owe it to our children to teach them how to live well, not just avoid the worst.
— Scott and Miranda Hudson
